Harry Potter and The Order of the Phoenix Movie.

I saw Harry Potter and The Order of the Phoenix last night, and my response is: meh. It was fine. I was heartily irritated by the book when it came out. It was 870 pages and the big whoo-hoo oh-my-god reveal at the end was… When Harry finally faces off with Voldemort, one of them has to die. Um, YEAH, we figured that. This is not news. This is not worth reading 870 pages for. I was extremely crabby about it and I didn’t preorder the next one and was seriously (Siriusly, har har har) considering not reading it. But all my friends rubbed my back and said, “There, there,” and I was soothed and Half-Blood Prince was great and all was right in the world. I didn’t have high hopes for the Order/Phoenix movie. It did the best it could with the crap material it was given. Poopy book ergo poopy movie.
Anyway, one of the big problems is that it is very difficult to shove 870 pages of an all-text-no-pictures book into a two-hour movie. One of my favorite moments to demonstrate this was the oft-discussed Cho Chang and Harry Potter kiss scene. Here’s how it happens: As Christmas nears and everyone gets ready to leave Hogwarts for winter break, Harry walks over to Cho, who’s looking at a picture of Cedric, the boy she was seeing who died. She mentions something about how she misses him, looks tearful, then says, “Is that mistletoe?” and they kiss. This all takes maybe twenty seconds. Wha..?
“I miss my boyfriend, who was killed by- ooh, festive holiday snogging plant!” (Smootch)
See what I mean? And the film is filled with that. Eh, what can you do. Now I’m just waiting for the last book to come out (next week!). I’ll tell you a secret: I really hope Harry Potter isn’t going to defeat Voldemort. I really hope it’s Neville Longbottom. I want the total underdog to come out and rain on Voldemort’s parade. That would be AWESOME. And highly unlikely, but I’m still rooting for Neville.

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