I am typing this from my super-pimped out fabulous apartment. I moved in on Friday and am now ensconced in a flurry of unpacking. I realized yesterday that 75% – 80% of my boxed possessions are decorative items. I am a master of ornate uselessness. My apartment is going to look like a gift shop, but I don’t care. It’s set up just the way I like it and I have to take no one else’s opinions into consideration. BLISS, I tell you. As soon as I’ve set it up somewhat and it stops looking like I have the Great Wall of China made from boxes in my living room, I will post pictures.
Archive for the ‘Apartment’ Category
I have moved!
Tuesday, July 15th, 2008I painted some fabric. I love you, Scribbles Shiny 3D Paint in Petunia Purple.
Monday, May 12th, 2008My friend B. likes purple. A great deal. It’s his most favoritest color ever. And he has big feet (size 13), so sometimes it is hard for him to find purple shoes. I took pity on his metatarsal plight and bought some Converse Chucks in his size and just JAZZED ‘em right up. They are so purply and peppy, I’m tempted to buy a pair and craftify them fer m’self. I tried to keep these as masculine as I could, but with mine I could use sparkles! Ah, sparkles.
And here is some of the painting in closer detail. JAZZY.
And because my purse with the pomegranate/virus pattern on it started to rip a little, I painted my latest purse with a delightful octopus. He’s black, but his spots are shimmery russet and on top of that are aquamarine rhinestones. EVEN JAZZIER.
My kitchen has a big ole piece of Formica-covered plywood next to the fridge, and I think I will make a cloth hanging with octopi and cuttlefish and jellies and other sea-beasties to hang over it so it’s not quite so… plastic-looking. I’m really going to try to make my kitchen more organic. Incorporate some wood and stones, things like that. We’ll see what happens.
Bamboo flooring. And photos of GCT.
Monday, May 5th, 2008The flooring is made of strips of ‘boo, and you can see the hinges or links or whatever you call it when the ‘boo does that thing it does with the stopping and starting. Sooo pretty.
The only problem is that my new flooring is much lower than the original flooring. The doors are all an inch and a half too short on the bottom. It looks stupid. It’s one of those things that I will fix if I get around to it, but I don’t really care. The flooring looks so spiffy I don’t care about much of anything. I loves my boo.
I chose three pictures for my bathroom. They’re not necessarily the most beautiful angles or the most interesting subjects but to me they have meaning and significance and all that junk, so whatever, it’s my bathroom and these are the pictures.
This is a shot I took at about 9:15 in the morning from under the overhang of GCT. The Chrysler Building is one of my favorites in all of Mannyhanny, and the clouds looked really cool that day. You can see the atmospheric haze. I see this everyday on the way to work and it makes me happy. I always think that the Chrysler Building is a giant hypodermic needle poking the fleshy clouds. Why that should make me happy I don’t know, but it does. Perhaps I have a secret affinity for diabetics and heroin addicts. Moving on.
This is a swirly architectural detail near Posman Books. I pass this all the time as well and I love that this could have been a boring old bracket and the architect decided to make it into a charming bit of design. And it’s about a foot above my head, so I can really see it, as opposed to many of the other neat-o things in GCT that are too far away to appreciate (the famous astrology ceiling, the chandeliers, etc.)
This is right under the boards for the New Haven line. I like three-sided things and I like light fixtures, ergo I LOVE this lamp. And there are so many textures and shapes in this picture. I’ve actually never seen these windows open, only the ticket windows on the other side of Vanderbilt Hall. They should really switch over to this side soon, the floor is starting to wear down on the other side. Anyway, I lived in Rye for most of my life and I took the New Haven line, so it has a great deal of significance to me. Now I’m going to live in White Plains and I’ll be taking the Harlem line, but the New Haven line will always have a place in my heart.
Check out my NY subway-style bathroom!
Friday, May 2nd, 2008I got my master bathroom done with subway tile and hexagonal floor tile and I chose a dirt-colored grout which accentuates the white tile and makes my bathroom look grotty like the Victorian-era New York subway. I LOVE IT. I took photos of some of my favorite elements of Grand Central Station yesterday and I’m going to hang three of those pictures in my bathroom. I might even install speakers and pipe in the sounds fire trucks and homeless people yelling to complete the tableau of greatness. An air freshener scented faintly like sewage and the look will be PERFECT. No, really, It’s exactly what I wanted and I’m thrilled to bits. Let me take you on a journey of my bathroom.
I’m standing in the shower to take this picture. You can see the hexagonal floor tile and the lovely wall tile. I’m having the painter paint over the grout smudges all over the walls that you can see there.
And this is a photo of the inside of the shower. My contractor (who is a genius) used leftover marble floor tile from the other bathroom for the seat in here. It feels like a sauna on the Lower East Side. I want to sit in there and sweat and then have a large Russian woman throw cold water on me.
Now the floor man is laying down bamboo flooring throughout the apartment and then the painter comes and paints and we’re DONE. FINALLY. And then I can move in.
My apartment Part 637. Plus some pretty cool news.
Friday, April 11th, 2008First, my interesting news. I got a job. I didn’t plan to, I was perfectly happy working in my underpants at home all day. But I was offered a terrific deal so I took it. Now I work at Publicis in Herald Square in Manhattan across from Macy’s. No one really knows my title, so I am going to say I am the Grand Poobah Designer of the Communications and New Business Departments. That’ll look nice on business cards.
Now, my apartment! Progress! I’m so happy!
A sink! A toilet! A floor! It’s so great! Really, it looks fantastic. I’m thrilled with how this came out. People should feel honored to tinkle here.
A view of the tub with the sink next to it. They still have to put in the hook that holds the showerhead up so right now it’s draped into the sink. Everyone remember that the walls are going to be painted white, so the tiles will “pop” more than they are now against that aqua sheetrock.
Since I’ve bought this apartment, I’ve been hemming and hawing about the other bathroom. I planned to redo it someday, but later on when I have more money. My mom called me the other day and said the workmen were there already, the hell with it, redo the other bathroom already. So I’m gonna. Money be damned! Here’s a pic of the bathroom as it is now:
I replaced the sink and the cabinet and I ripped out the formica countertop and full-wall mirror and that’s where I planned to stop. Now we’re going to tile the walls (halfway up, like wainscotting) and the floor, get a new toilet in there (this one is tiny and grey, new toilet will be bigger and white) and replace the tiles and fixtures in the shower. Here, look at the shower:
There’s three handles in there. And the tile is chipped and you know, bleagh. So I’m going to the tile place this weekend and I shall peruse the stock and pick wall tiles that fill me with mirth and delight. I spend my weekends looking for tile for the bathroom! I’m old now!
My apartment.
Tuesday, April 1st, 2008But first:
There’s a funeral parlor in the town next to my parents, in Port Chester NY. I have loved and coveted this funeral parlor for years. It’s a white ornate Victorian house with two staircases, a wraparound porch, a turret-y thing, adorable windows and details, etc. Oh, I want it so bad. It sits on a hill a ways away from the street, so as you come down the hill, (angels singing) Aaaaaaahhhhhhh…, there it is. AND NOW IT’S FOR SALE. It needs a good coat of paint and some TLC, but damn, if I hadn’t just bought an apartment, I would snap this place up in a second. So if anyone out there has however much they’re asking for this big ole painted lady, can I please have the money so I can buy my dream house? Thank you.
And now, my apartment! As told through photography!
Well, as you can see, there’s no more mirrored wall. And it’s been sheet-rocked over. We’re getting there. Now the room doesn’t toy with your sense of perspective, making you think the room is bigger than it is, and then BLAM you’re slammed in the face by a mirror and you’re sad and you have a dent on your forehead. So that’s good.
That’s my super-phenomenal boyfriend Cricket attempting to figure out how to change my cabinet doors should I want to (and I want to). I made a budget for myself for my kitchen of $10,000. Don’t laugh, I’m trying to achieve it and I may make it still. I found a place in Pennsylvania that makes cabinet doors and you have to stain them, put the hardware on them and install them yourself, but it whacks the price way down. So that is what Cricket is attempting to figure out, whether we can attach the doors and not have them catch on each other or chip on each other or just rip the hell out of the cabinets.
Look! I have a tub! With fancy-shmancy tile! The tile makes my bathroom look like a W hotel or a spa. It’s soooooothing, which is pretty much what I was going for. I didn’t want a zesty bathroom with lots of pizzaz. I wanted a bathroom a Buddist would walk into and meditate in.
Now, this is what’s next to the tub (read: nothing). There is a distinct absence of a pooping device and a hand-washing device (and a floor), but that’s all getting done this week, and then maybe I can move in! Someday soon! Like before my birthday (July 31st)! Hurrah and Hippity Skip!
Gaze in awe at my new bathroom.
Tuesday, March 11th, 2008I’m going to try the Emperor’s New Clothes technique right here:
Isn’t this a lovely toilet? Isn’t it elegant with sleek lines? Note the attractive light fixtures I picked out.
And here’s my sink. I especially like the cabinetry under the sink to hold nice “guest” soaps.
And here’s the tub. Isn’t the tile I chose just smashing?
Oh, I can’t keep this facade up anymore. My bathroom looks like it was bombed with Skud missiles. But eventually, it will be beautiful. Eventually. Like, before I’m forty. Maybe.
Welcome to my new apartment! Wheee!
Sunday, January 20th, 2008FINALLY. Pics of the apartment. It’s bright, it’s big, it’s nifty. Enjoy the journey.
You open the front door and, voila! You are greeted by twenty feet of window. Granted, it’s creepy institutional window, but window nonetheless. Do not be fooled by how big the room looks. It’s very big, but if you look carefully, you will notice that the wall at the end behind the light fixture is mirrored. The mirrors will be going. Also, that octagonal thing in the right corner? We’ll get to that in a minute.
That’s the kitchen. It’s BIG. There’s two ovens and a dishwasher (called the Potscrubber 700, I just love that, so futuristic). And a ginormous fridge with the freezer on the bottom (score!). The previous owners built that little wall there and the octagonal thing was a big Formica table in the middle so someone could sit in the kitchen and someone could sit in the dining area and it was like a breakfast nook. A breakfast nook FROM HELL. That wall will be going. As will the octagon. I will not miss them.
Different view of the kitchen. See the Potscrubber 700? Also, please appreciate the Formica FESTIVAL going on in here. Countertops, backsplash, cabinets, even the handles on the cabinets. The previous owners must have had stock in Formica, it’s all over the bathrooms as well. I can’t afford both a new countertop and refacing the cabinets, so I may have to get all DIY and do some stuff to the kitchen myself. Luckily I have handy friends who will join me in my quest to end Formica’s reign of terror in my apartment. We may have some casualties, but we will win this war.
Now let’s head down the hallway with too many closets to…
…the guest room! Note: more giant windows. I don’t know precisely what to do with this room yet, maybe library/guest room, maybe office, we’ll see. Oh, and all the carpeting in the whole apartment is going. It’s icky and I am prone to allergies, but underneath is parquet which I’m having sanded and refinished and that will be nice. Moving on.
Across the hall is the guest bathroom. This is the major project in the apartment. I’m ripping this whole sucker out. It be hideous and I no likey. The fixtures will be in the same place, but they’ll be white and modern and nice and the Formica will DIE and I will rejoice over its Formica corpse. I may even dance upon it.
Another view. The tub is six inches tall so you can only cover your kneecaps in water and the tile makes you feel like you’re bathing in a big quilt.
Now, my bedroom. Again, windows out the wazoo. Also, it has its own bathroom and a freakin’ awesome closet.
This is the master bathroom. Now, it’s also kind of unattractive, but you have to pick your battles, and since I’m probably the only person who’s going to see it, I don’t really care if it’s kind of unnatractive. Also, the previous owners were a thousand years old, so there are a delightful collection of bars in the shower stall. And they built a seat into it. Truly. They bashed out a chunk of wall in the closet next to it and built a happy little divot into the shower. Niiiiice.
And this is the super-killer closet with built-in super-killerness. I don’t need a bureau in my bedroom, I can fit all of my clothing items in this puppy. There’s plenty more I could show you in the apartment, like the millions of closets I’ll never use or the water heaters, but I figure you get the idea.
My apartment.
Tuesday, January 8th, 2008I got it! I got an apartment! The one with the floorplan! (quick recap of floorplan):
It’s mine, all mine! (Insert maniacal laughter here.) However, as with anything, I am learning that I am an adult and being an adult is unbelievably frustrating. Like, I sure would like a different countertop in my kitchen. I have gray Formica. But I do not, at this time, have $8000 to get a granite/Corian/Silestone countertop, which is how much it would cost. It looks like I will have to learn to love my Formica. And I would like to fix my ceiling in my bathroom. It’s ugly and you can see the screws and the plywood, etc. But I cannot fix it because that is the access to the plumbing for the apartment upstairs and if the apartment upstairs floods, plumbers will come into my apartment and rip out all my tiling or whatever to get at the pipes and fix the leak. So it is best to be able to see the screws for easy access. I feel thwarted in my attempts to make my apartment all pretty-like. But I’ll work it out. And pictures will be forthcoming soon.
The apartment I’m buying.
Tuesday, November 20th, 2007Since it’s occupying all my time, I figured I’d share the whole-apartment-buying thing. It helps to know whence I came to appreciate why buying the apartment I’m buying is so nifty.This is my present apartment on 57th and 10th in Manhattan.
This is the view of my apartment from the hallway.
You see those windows in the first picture? This is me standing at the windows photographing the front door.
This is a close-up of the kitchen you see in the second picture. From left on the bottom: refrigerator (no freezer), teeny-tiny sink, and teeny tiny stove with oven that I have never opened.
This is the view from my bed. There is my beloved glass teat, the television. And also there is my formidable collection of art, graphic design and beading magazines.
This is my giant closet. Seriously, it’s like the closet from “The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe”. It goes back four feet. All my earthly possessions live in it. Sometimes it is tidy and clean. More often it is not. This is a picture of “not”.
This is my bathroom. My bathroom rocks. It is nicely sized and has all new fixtures and tiles. There’s an industrial toilet (no tank) so when you flush it, it sucks the first two layers of skin off your ass. The shower gets nice and hot quickly and nothing leaks.
Now, I’m sure you’re asking yourself, “That’s nice, but what about the other rooms?” There are no other rooms. My apartment, in its entirety, is 11 by 19 feet. I cannot have a full-sized bed because then I could not walk around. Now, don’t get me wrong. I love this apartment. This apartment has served my needs admirably for two years. It is close to my job. It is close to Lincoln Center and the theater district. It is close to a delightful myriad of restaurants. It is close to the subway. There is a concierge. There is laundry in the basement and I don’t have to drag my dirty clothes around the streets of Manhattan to a laundromat. The apartment doesn’t take more than three hours to clean top-to-bottom. But it is expensive ($1400 a month) and I simply cannot afford Manhattan anymore. So I am buying an apartment in White Plains, NY. Here is a floorplan of my new apartment:
If you look carefully, you will see that my present apartment can fit in its entirety into my master bedroom. This apartment, aside from being mighty big (1200 sq. ft.), comes with a dishwasher, two ovens, a concierge, a garage parking spot (no chiselling the icy crust of winter off my windshield and cursing) and windows. Lots and lots of windows. See that edge-of-wall at the bottom of the floorplan, underneath the names of the rooms and their sizes? That’s all windows. In my present apartment, I look out on an airshaft. It’s always dim, even in the middle of summer. Now I’m going to have my favorite kind of houseplants, cactii and succulents (need lots of sun, not much water). There are setbacks, of course. Not being in Manhattan is a big one. I will miss that greatly. But White Plains is a fairly big city, and I am eight-tenths of a mile from the center of town which contains: A 15-movie multiplex, Barnes & Noble, Target, P.F. Chang’s, Hot Topic and Torrid (long live mall goth!), a creperie, The Metropolitan Museum of Art Store, Beadworks, Sephora, Pottery Barn, Crate and Barrel, Filene’s Basement and a whole lot more. I can walk to those. And I can walk to the train station (also eight-tenths of a mile). If I drive, hell, I can do anything. There’s a huge Asian community living near me so all around me are cool Asian grocery stores (Japanese? Okay. Korean? You got it. Chinese? Not a problem. AWESOME.) And there’s an art-supply store and a 24-hour CVS a little over a mile from my apartment (also AWESOME – Maalox at two in the morning is important, trust me). And a million billion other things all around me. I just have to get used to it not being smooshed right up against me, Manhattan-style. And if I hate and I can’t stand it (“It’s so peaceful and soothing out here! Ahhhhh! And what’s with all these goddamned trees?!??”), I can always sell it and move back into a prison cell in Manhattan.
