Archive for the ‘New York’ Category

Westminster Dog Show 2010. Also, belated Christmas present.

Thursday, February 18th, 2010

1. Snorth and I exchanged holiday presents in February (hey, are you perfect? I think not), I gave her the “Rubenstein D’Grumples” drawing, and she surprised me with this great piece. Here’s the back story: Snorth bought a flower pot that looks like a snail. It cracked, so she was no longer able to put plants in it. Instead of weeping and rending her garments, she repurposed it. She crocketed a little dome out of eyelash yarn, which looked like a little moss cap, and then crocketed accompanying mushrooms on top of that. Snorth stuffed the snail pot and put this moss ‘n’ mushrooms on top and voila: instant terrificness.

snail1 snail2

Isn’t that charming? I don’t know where to put it in my apartment yet, but I love it and I’m going to find it a good home.

2. DOG SHOW OMG BBQ. Anyone who reads this blog knows how much I look forward to this thing every year. And this year was no disappointment. My camera decided to die last year at Westminster, so I was concerned I wouldn’t have any pictures this year with my new camera, like I was cursed. But my new camera did great and many of my pictures came out just fine. I’m going to take you through the benching area which isn’t photographed much. It’s where the dogs are groomed and where they wait before being judged.

There are these little patches of wood shavings throughout the room, and that’s where the dogs relieve themselves before heading out into the ring. Here are two papillons (French for “butterfly”, so called because of the giant, wing-like ears) contemplating takin’ a tinkle.

papillon

In order to keep your beast looking their best, you have to use a myriad of styling tools on them. The groomers use all the ones you see at the salons: hairdryers, hairspray, brushes, combs, fancy foot baths, even eye shadow. And oh so many hair clips and hair ties. Here you see a fine fellah rockin’ some sweet blue ones.

hairbows

Here’s an afgan wearing a snood. The afgan’s ears are long and covered with hair, and you don’t want that dragging on the ground and in their food bowl, do you? No, you don’t. So many dogs with ears like that are seen wearing what appears to be festively-colored granny-panties on their head.

snood

This one is blurry, but I couldn’t not include it. This dog has his ears wrapped, I don’t know why. I’m sure they have a good reason. It does make the dog look really silly, like a highly displeased Pippy Longstocking. I giggled when I saw him.

blue-ears

This dog is getting a foot bath. I guess his feet were shmutzy. I just loved how he looked like he had been on a coffee and cigarettes bender for a week.

hairy

This is a sheepdog wearing socks. Please note how fluffy the dog is, and then look at the socks and realize how skinny he actually is under all that fluffitude. The handler was helpful in telling me that this was the back end of the dog (sometimes it is hard to tell).

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And this is the front.

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I loved this dog solely because he reminded me of Stains.

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Here is a picture of the nicest German shepherd you ever could meet. It liked to hop up on its back legs, put its front legs on its owner’s shoulders, and give her kisses all over her face. Awwwww.

german-shepherd

These is my most favorite dog breed in the whole world, the Borzoi. Borzois are also known as Russian Wolfhounds. They have been used in art and paintings for centuries because they’re so elegant and lithe.

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Here is a male and female borzoi hangin’ out, being photogenic unintentionally. Even when they’re not trying to be pretty, they are.

borzoi1

And here’s a female borzoi laying on the ground, having a meaningful discussion with my mother. I think I’m going to have this framed for her.

borzoi2

Darth Vader and pretty graphic design.

Friday, February 12th, 2010

Upon arriving to work the other day, I was greeted by the Imperial March blaring from gigantor speakers outside my office. When I leaned out a window to see what was going on, I was greeted by this sight:

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Yeah, so Foot Locker is coming out with Star Wars-themed shoes. This is to bring awareness of the shoes to the public. Following the “standing there” portion of the morning, Darth and the storm troopers decided it would a good idea to weave through midtown traffic. I don’t know, Darth Vader looks considerably less imposing when trotting past a Sunglass Hut. Note there are very few storm troopers behind them because they cannot navigate around the cabs. It was a weird morning.

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But on a totally different note, I designed something purty! Most of the work I do here is not particularly creative, but every once in a while I get to bust out my artsy chops and bring the illustrating hammer down. Which I did this week. There was a request for graphics representing “growth”, “new talent”, “leadership”, and “regional offices”. And they liked what I did, so the illustrations made it into the book we produced.

1growth 2newtalent 3leadership 4regionalhighlights

Moon and etc.

Monday, January 25th, 2010

Not much has been going on in my world worth blogging about (you wanna hear how I cleaned my bathroom? And made a presentation for work? I think not), but I did see the movie Moon starring Sam Rockwell. No, really, JUST starring Sam Rockwell. Sam Rockwell is the only person in it. Kevin Spacey does the voice of the robot Gerty, but other than that, it’s like Castaway. I saw it by myself, and then I saw it again with my father, which was great because I missed a whole bunch of stuff the first time around. You spend the first watching of the film saying, “Where did that come from?” and “Isn’t he supposed to be dead?” and things like that. So when I watched it with my father, I got a chance to really catch all the things that had me confused the first time. Here’s a brief plot synopsis without giving away the ending: Sam Bell is an astronaut on the moon all by his lonesome. Some giant industrious company back on earth has figured out how to get clean energy from the rocks on the moon, so Sam Bell monitors the harvesting machines and sends the energy back home, etc. It’s a lonely existence, but in two weeks Sam will get to return to earth and see his family. And then… things start happening. Nee noo nee noo nee noo nee noo. No, it’s not really like that, there’s no Aryan princess sitting in front of a snowy TV screen informing you of the arrival of bad things. It’s an extremely well-done film and I hope it wins lots of awards. If you want a more detailed review, go here.

In a totally non-movie-related news, Cricket mocked me for talking about a “twig district” in New York. There isn’t really a twig district, there’s a flower district, and one can procure many a twig or branch there. I took a picture of one shop to illustrate that.

twig-district

That’s one of the things I truly love about New York, the districts. There’s the bead district, a restaurant district, the plastic district, a light bulb district, etc. And those are only the ones I know. Who knows what other wonderful clusters of shops New York holds?

The other thing I took a photo of is this gorgeous enclosed bridge that I walk by from time to time.

building-linker

It’s like an enchanted world. It connects two dull buildings with its ornate coppery multi-levelness. I would love to walk across it one day. In the meantime, I can just walk past it and drool.

Addition: Lookit! Brain-sucker cupcakes! How fabulous!

flickrbrainslugcupcake-500x501

Failey McFailpants. And life drawing.

Monday, January 11th, 2010

First, I have a cold. My nose is polished like an apple from all the tissue-rubbage. Then, you know that big thing I working on for work, all day every day for what seems like forever (about 100 days, in reality)? We didn’t get the project. And last night, I was working on the Rubenstein D’Grumples piece and I think I’m going to have to scrap the complicated frame thing that I worked on for twelvityteen hours. I’ll blog about that later. All in all, a week/weekend filled with FAIL. Which is disappointing. However, during New Year’s weekend, because of work I canceled all my plans to have fun with people – except one. I had found a list of inexpensive things to do in the city, and one was to draw burlesque dancers, life-drawing-style, for ten dollars. So, sure enough, on January 2nd, I headed down to the Slipper Room on the Lower East Side and attended Dr. Sketchy’s Anti-Art Class. I figured it was only ten bucks and one of two things could happen: it could be a not-very-good drawing class and I could have a cool story to tell later, or it could be great drawing class and I could have some drawings come out of it. It turned out to be a bit of both. A little back history first. I have been taking life drawings on and off for almost twenty years, and I love taking classes. The human body never gets old, and you always come out better than you went in. You improve at drawing hands, or you have a more fluid line, or you can increase your ability to define shadows, etc. Here are some drawings from some of my previous classes.

drawing6 drawing12 drawing21

See? I tried different things with each of those drawings, and in turn I got more gooder at drawin’. Back to the class: I trekked down to The Slipper Room and went in, where I was greeted by a person in a full-body chicken suit (of course! Why the hell not?). The chicken held up a small placard which said, “Welcome! if you are not on the list, it will be $12.” I spoke directly into the chicken’s mouth and informed it that I was on the list. After the chicken found my name, it picked up a second placard that said, “Thank you! Please take a seat anywhere.” (It was an extremely courteous chicken.) I found a seat up near the front where the stage was and proceeded to chat with the girl next to me who was a chemist and had worked for a soy sauce company. The place filled up pretty fast with a plethora of youthful hipsters (I wanted to yell at all of them, “Wash you hair! Pull it out of your eyes! Hey, you ever heard of doing laundry? Look into it!” I am old). Then the people in charge came up on the stage. Apparently there is a theme to every Anti-Art Class, and this one was Disco Bloodbath. For those of you who weren’t keeping up with your New York gossip in the mid ’90s, here’s a short history. There was a club kid named Michael Alig and he threw parties at major clubs in the city. He got into a dispute over money with his drug dealer Angel Melendez, so in a drug haze Alig whacked Angel in the head with a hammer, injected Drano into his veins, and put him in a tub full of ice. A few days later, Alig lopped Angel’s legs off and tossed him in the Hudson. Alig then proceeded to tell this story to EVERYONE HE KNEW, and no one turned him in. It took a while for him to go to prison (where he is now). His club friend James St. James wrote a book about the whole thing called Disco Bloodbath. And Macauley Culkin restarted his career starring as Michael Alig in the movie Party Monster. So that being the theme, the hosts of this event were dressed as characters from this sordid tale, and the model had props such as a hammer, a bottle of Drano, a comically large fake syringe, and a skull. The model was spectacular. Her name is Madame Rosebud, and really, she was the best model I’ve ever drawn. She looks like this.

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But she had her hair all spiked up on her head, and she was covered in strips of black and white electrician’s tape (which was very irksome to an old-school life drawer such as m’self; I couldn’t define her edges). She did the standard ten one-minute poses, then five-minute poses, then three twenty-minute poses. And she worked HARD. In one of her five-minute poses she had her tongue out, and she didn’t even drool all over herself. And in one of her twenty-minute poses, she had her arm straight out. For twenty minutes. That hurts so, so much. I tipped her a whole bunch, I was so blown away. I got three good drawings out of the experience. These are two five-minute ones.

madame-rosebud1

And this is the twenty-minute one where she had her arm out. Two things: that is not armpit hair, I had just started to incorporate shadows when the pose ended, and that’s as far as I had gotten. And I learned that when a slim model with spiked hair and no bosoms poses for you, your drawings predominantly look like AstroBoy.

madame-rosebud2

Two things.

Tuesday, December 15th, 2009

1. Publicis had its annual meeting followed by its annual holiday party, which this year took place at Avenue. That’s some swanky club that Lindsay Lohan tends to frequent. I spent the whole evening sitting in an armchair lip-syncing and vogue-ing to the music blasting out of the speakers and being so thoroughly embarrassing that the CCO turned his back on me in order to hold a normal conversation without having me in his line of vision. ‘Cuz I’m CLASSAY. Anyway, whoever decided the decor of Avenue clearly wanted the place to resemble a dungeon, or maybe Hogwarts. There were all these portraits all over the wall – I expected them to ask me the password to the Griffindor common room at any time.

hogwartz

2. I understand the the White Power people are very angry and they would very much like this to be a country of pasty-colored people, I get all that. What I didn’t know was that they were such big Lisa Frank fans. Let me explain: This is some of Lisa Frank’s product. Those of you that owned Trapper Keepers in the ’80s will be familiar with her work.

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And this is a tattoo I found during my daily viewing of various blogitoriums.

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Except for the swastika armband and the poorly written “white power” near the top of the buttcheek, it’s like my elementary school folders come to life. I don’t think this is what Hitler had in mind.

Christmukkah is upon us.

Friday, December 11th, 2009

I haven’t had time to run up to Saks to see their window display, but one of the benefits to working across the street from Macy’s is that I can see the Macy’s windows all the time. Every night this week that I worked late, it helped to walk out of my building and see this:

window

And look! Finally I got a shot where you can see the owl’s eyes with the green lights! Only took me two years. See those trees there? They have what I call “the dripping lights”. Last year I tried to make an animated gif of how it looked.

This year, I tried again.

dripping-trees

It is an equally underwhelming gif. But trust me, in person it is lovely and breathtaking and it makes working in Herald Square during Christmas totally bearable.

So, Macy’s window displays. They are traumatic. They have some sort of storyline about working in Santa’s toy factory, and there are many moving figures and pretty holiday music and all that good stuff. It’s just… the workers in the factory are creepy as all get-out. They are elves and robots. The least upsetting elves look like Joan Rivers:

window1

And the most upsetting elves look like possessed demons with no irises in their eyes. This one looks like she’s so deep in Satan’s clutches she’s going to start throwing up bees.

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But for me the worst things were the robots. They’re EVIL, and not just regular evil, no no, they’re like psychotic “Heath Ledger as the Joker” evil. They are the makers of nightmares.

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Make him stop looking at me, Mommy! I christen these windows as ho-ho-horrifying.

The healthful benefits of fried food.

Monday, November 9th, 2009

As I have mentioned before, I work in Koreatown, which is a wonderful area if you like spicy food with lots of vegetables and rice (which I do). I pass tons of restaurants which show pictures of their food with a lot of comments like this: “Tofu cooked in mineral water to aid digestion” or “Our kimchi has healthful elements to prevent disease”, all of which is fine. Snorth, the other day, told me about this amazing Korean fried chicken place called Bon Chon. So I went to their website.

http://www.bonchon.com/eng/

Okay, fine, you make life-alteringly delicious fried chicken. Why must you repeat that it is healthy and low-calorie? It’s FRIED CHICKEN. Do you remember when KFC had that horrendously written commercial campaign? It was the one where they said, “You know, if you strip the skin and breading off of our fried chicken, it’s really quite healthy,” and America, as a group, was like OH FOR REAL COME ON do not compare your processed fried chicken to a big bowl of dark green arugula and kale PLEASE KTHX. I’m having flashbacks of that with Bon Chon. Also, for engrish, it’s pretty stellar. Here are some quotes about the signature Bon Chon taste secret:

We use only vegetable oils to fry our chicken. Along with our special sauce, this process eliminates oil and water from the chicken so that it can create lean and crispy tastes. (OH FOR REAL COME ON, etc.)
The initial flavor of the fried chicken decelerates as the temperature cools down.
You hand remains almost free form our ingredient sauce.
Your fingers and hands should remain free from its sauce because the sauce and ingredients remain intact with the chicken.

Halloween Part II.

Monday, November 2nd, 2009

Went to NYC for Halloween this year to see my friend Jon Riedel’s annual dance performance. You know how a lot of ballet companies do The Nutcracker? Jon does a choreographed interpretation of several of Edward Gorey’s short stories. He does The Evil Garden, The Doubtful Guest and The Gashleycrumb Tinies, as well as others. If you’re around next Halloween, I highly recommend seeing them. Here’s a link to his site:
http://www.riedeldancetheater.org/

The Riedel Dance Theater was in Soho, so I got to see quite a few terrific costumes. There’s a problem with Manhattan and Halloween, which is that the normally weird and slightly “off” people you know to avoid just blend in, and you can’t tell the people dressed up as freaky people from the truly freaky people. Like this woman I saw at the train station. I took a picture surreptitiously from behind a sign, so it’s not so great, but I’ll walk you though it.

mushroom-costume

Okay, so she’s got the big sparkly red hat with the feathers, fine. But on her body she has a tuxedo jacket and a black boa over something that resembles a fat suit for her knees, or a flesh-colored mushroom. She gave me the impression that today was just another day to her (”Ho hum, it’s Monday, time to put on the Vegas headdress and the goiter pants”). Had this not been Halloween, I would have had the crazy radar go off BEEP BEEP BEEP and I would have known to stay away. Such a confusing day.

I saw two costumes that were terrific. One was a poke at my heartstrings, because it was one of my favorite Muppets: Beaker.

beaker

The mouth flapped and everything! You can see his eyeholes right under his collar. The second costume, well, that was just special. And if you’re of a delicate nature, maybe you should stop reading right now. At Jon’s party, someone was dressed as a full moon. Here was the front of his costume:

full-moon-front

Aaaaaand here was the back.

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Yeah.

Pretty pretty cupcakes.

Tuesday, October 20th, 2009

But first, spam! Spam that has been sent to my comments, as you know, periodically tries to mask its intent in order for me to approve it and allow it on through. It has tried complete gibberish, and unintentionally poetic phrases, and false inducing of pity, and random collections of proverbs. Now the new tack, which I happen to like very much, is to tell me a charming childhood joke, like one you might find in Highlights magazine.

jokey-spam

This cracks me up, because now I want to tell people jokes and then yell a medication’s name after the punchline. “What do cats put in their drinks? Mice cubes. LEVITRA!!”

Now, on to cupcakes. I went to a lovely party on Saturday night for a girl I went to college with, her 30th birthday party. Lini, the birthday girl, is bringing back the 1950s house arts in a big way. She made a German chocolate cake with what I referred to as “aggressive frosting.” You know how most people attempt to make frosting as smooth and uniform as possible? Not Lini. Lini put smashed pecans and coconut shreds in it so it looked like it was furry and alive. It reminded me of that monster book from Harry Potter, like if I got to close to the cake teeth would just SPRING OUT from nowhere and there would be snarling and gnashing and whatnot. I swear it heard it growling. But it was delish, so whatever. Anyway, Lini and I were talking about how much we love cake decorating shows because, hey, they’re decorating something. And then you get to eat it! And in addition to the German chocolate cake, we had cupcakes, which inspired me to share some really gorgeous cupcake designs with y’all.

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And my personal favorite, because it reminds me of my childhood:

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I iz 32. Feels a lot like 31. Also, Pinkberry and forthcoming art.

Monday, August 3rd, 2009

I had a lovely birthday, thank you. I went up to the Berkshires in Massachusetts and saw some theater, ate some food and generally just chilled. It was extremely mellow. I saw a few movies: Grey Gardens (the new HBO movie, not the documentary it is based on), and while it was excellently acted and apparently truthful, it also made me really sad. It was a freakin’ sad film, about unfulfilled dreams and wasted talents and a lost era, all that fun stuff. Ruined my Saturday night, I can tell you that. I also saw Wedding Crashers (finally!) and it was quite good. I mean, it didn’t change my life or anything, but it was amusing and clever and I had no idea how funny Vince Vaughn was! And now I do. I might, just might see The Breakup one day, even though romantic comedies (or anti-romantic comedies, as that one appears to be) are not my bag. VV might make it worth my while.

Also, in a totally unrelated note, I have tried Pinkberry for the first time this afternoon and it is yummy-nummy. I like the bacterial tang of yogurt, so that is a lovely change from regular frozen yogurt. I would recommend what I had, regular flavor with little yogurt chips (like the coating on yogurt-covered raisins). Dee-lishious. I don’t think I’ll become addicted or anything, but I can understand why others have become so. I think the fact that small is five bucks is definitely going to prevent me from making this a habit. But it is a pleasant treat every once in a blue moon.

I’m working on a ton of projects right now, so I’ll be telling you about those as they develop. Some graphic design, some logo design, some jewelry design, whooo, it’s a busy life. I shall keep you posted.