Archive for June, 2009

I swear I am not making any of this up.

Friday, June 26th, 2009

I turned on the TV five minutes ago and on TLC there is a brand new program called Paint Misbehavin’, about a paint company. A really edgy paint company that, you know, invents paint. It’s owned by a tattooed yellow-goatee-ed guy named Steve (okay) and there are various other Gen X people working there (still okay), an Indian scientist named Arup with a really heavy accent and an obvious toupee (wha…?) and a voice-over guy. With a pronounced lisp. How, HOW, I ask you, am I not supposed to laugh at this? First, the Indian guy sounds exactly like every stereotypical Indian in every movie, and then the voice-over guy comes on and tells us, “With all these thetbackth, Thteve may not make hith deadline.” I’m trying really, really hard not to giggle.

http://www.hardlifestyle.com/paint_misbehavin_tlc_discovery_show.html

Could someone go and watch this show, and tell me you chortled to yourself as well, so I don’t feel so bad about myself? Thank you.

I made some bracelets fer sellin’.

Wednesday, June 24th, 2009

In my travels through the bead district I found some really interesting glass beads and I couldn’t wait to use them. Even though I should be doing other things, I couldn’t help myself and I made three bracelets with them.

bracelets1.jpg  bracelets2.jpg

Once again, I face the problem I always do. I love the way they came out, but I can’t keep everything I make, especially since I almost never wear jewelry anyway. So I’m going to sell them, but I’m going to be sad when I do. They’re… they’re my babies. (sniff)

Say it ain’t so.

Tuesday, June 23rd, 2009

I found this wonderful blog entry on The Sneeze.

http://www.thesneeze.com/2009/how-to-tell-if-your-state-sucks.php

In short, it says that if you are on a state website and within one click you see a picture of a hot-air balloon, the state is mega ultra lame-o. And I laughed and enjoyed that, but then I decided to check the New York State website, you know, just to make sure. And then… sadness.

no-new-york-no.jpg

It’s peekin’ off there on the right, but it’s undeniable. Hot-air balloon on New York tourism website = New York sucks. Plus the name “Letchworth” isn’t helping at all.

Two things I am undecided about.

Monday, June 22nd, 2009

1. As you might know, I work in the bead-and-sparkly-rhinestone district of New York. I see a ton of tacky excessive things on my walk to work (remember this image from a previous post?):

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Now a new hat shop has opened on my route. I had glanced into the window briefly, but one day I took a moment to really look. And aside from seeing these (SO BAD!):

hat1.jpg

On the top shelf was a large conical straw hat covered with plastic apples and pears. I cannot, for the life of me, figure out where you would wear it. I mean, we are in the fashion district and this is something an extra would wear during the “We Welcome You To Munchkintown” song in the Wizard of Oz.

hat2.jpg

Now, most of me is like NO NO DON’T SELL THAT, SOMEONE WILL BUY IT AND WEAR IT, but part of me is I WANT TO BE THAT PERSON GIMME THE HAT. I know it’s wrong and bad, but it’s also awesome in a Carmen Miranda way. And the theatrical drama nerd in me wants to wear it while singing showtunes. Loudly. I feel dirty for even considering the possibility of the hat. Bad hat! Tempting Jessica like that.

Also, in case it doesn’t match your outfit, they have one made just with green pears.

hat3.jpg

2. The TrueBlood logo.

trueblood2ad.jpg

I love handwritten fonts and it’s nice to see someone not relying on computer-generated typefaces for everything, but it also looks like they spread out the word “true” and then realized they had not budgeted enough space for the word “blood” and the writer said, “Okay, okay, not a problem, I’ll just squoosh ‘blood’ into skeeeeny letters and everything will be fine.” Ergo the indecision.

Also, in a completely unrelated note, did you see the pictures from Tim Burton’s remake of Alice In Wonderland? They look beautiful, but everyone says the Mad Hatter is played by Johnny Depp, and I am convinced this is a picture of Elijah Wood. Look at it. It looks just like him.

deppx-large.jpg redqueenx-large.jpg alice-topper.jpg

Addendum: The fruity hats are gone! Either they have been sold or burned in some kind of produce-based ritual. I don’t care, I’m just glad the temptation to buy idiotic headware is gone.

Up: A review. With spoilers kept to a minimum.

Wednesday, June 17th, 2009

I saw Up, the new Pixar film. And it was… weird. Very weird. Like, it was good, but it SO wasn’t a kid’s film. Within the first ten minutes I said, “Whoa, I feel for the parents in the audience that have to explain the topics touched upon already.” It felt like an independent film, not very Pixar or Disney at all. And yet, there were parts that were total slapstick and very funny. It was a confusing film. I felt some parts were weak plot-wise, and then some parts were too strong and poignant. And sometimes these feelings overlapped. I made a small diagram to explain that:

emotions.jpg

Each color represents a different emotion I felt. Go see it, you’ll see what I mean.

The most important thing I was reminded of was how much I love the Pixar shorts. I’ve always looked forward to those. And, as usual, the short for Up didn’t disappoint. Because it’s still in the theaters I won’t link to it now, I’ll give you a chance to go see it properly, but some of the others I will share that had a specific impact on me.

This was the first thing I ever saw of theirs, Luxo, Jr.. I saw it on Sesame Street as a wee tot and was totally captured.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1pVidZtnPE

Then, when I was in college, A Bug’s Life came out with Geri’s Game as the short and I became a hard-core lover of Pixar. PIXAR 4 LIFE (insert appropriate gang sign here)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UFiHP8TImOo

My favorite of all time came out soon after that, For The Birds. It came out with Monsters, Inc. Still, to this day, I can watch it and laugh like a little schoolgirl.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wnX7V8eG8is

Another one that really was sweet and amusing was the short for Ratatouille, called Lifted. Terrific, sweet, funny. I like how the student alien can swivel his eyeballs without the rest of his face.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5cv5-SgANG8

And finally, the short from WALL-E, called Presto. I have rarely laughed so hard in my life.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=130qT36_UnE

Oh, that can’t be right.

Saturday, June 13th, 2009

People, I present to you… The Sashimi Tabernacle Choir.

 http://www.evilmadscientist.com/article.php/sashimichoir

I’m starting to think of everything like those Facebook quizzes.

Wednesday, June 10th, 2009

Celebrities I look like:

Judah Friedlander

Eugene Mirman

Opus the Penguin

Things I Don’t Like That Everyone Else Seems To Like:

Torchiere Lamps

Parmesan Cheese

NPR

Maybe something I should make a piece about soon.

Tuesday, June 9th, 2009

First, a thoughtful spammy message brought to you by the caring folks who sell prescription drugs over the internet:

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I can’t even FATHOM what this means. But for some reason, it’s really really intriguing. I can tell you, if I ever become a superhero or a Nordic warrior, I want to be Viscera the Vascular.

So, my mom told me about this poem by a French man named Jacques Prevert. She translated it for me, and it is delightful and would make a wonderful series of pieces, or a small book, or something like that. I’m going to give it more thought and try to figure out how best to illustrate it.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

The Song of the Snails Who Went to a Funeral

Two snails went off
To the funeral of an autumn leaf
Their shells were black
Crepe draped around their eye stalks
They go off in the dark
On a beautiful autumn night
Alas when they arrive
It is already springtime
The leaves that had died
Have all resuscitated
And the two snails
Are very disappointed
But here comes the sun
The sun says to them
Do take the trouble
The trouble to sit down
Have a glass of beer
If your heart so desires
Take if you please
A bus ride to Paris
You will see the country
But do not keep on mourning
I’m telling you that
It darkens the white of the eye
And makes one ugly
The stories of coffins
Are sad and not pretty
Take back your own colors
The colors of life
Then all the animals
The trees and the plants
Begin to sing
To sing out loud
The true living song
The song of summer
And everyone had a drink
And everyone got tipsy
It’s a very beautiful evening
And the two snails
Made their way home
They were very moved
Because they had had lots to drink
They staggered a wee bit
But up there in the sky
The moon watched over them.

Two artists I think are very cool and I want to share with you.

Wednesday, June 3rd, 2009

Since not much is going on other than work in my world right now, I thought I would take some time out and tell you about two artists I am very fond of. One is Jeremy Fish. He is an illustrator/painter/designer who seems to know no bounds. I can’t really pinpoint why I love his work so much, but I think it has to do with his incredible use of a very limited palette and his excellent brushwork. Also, Jeremy Fish’s marriage of the cute and the creepy is great. No one else in my family likes his work, mainly because he uses skulls so much, but I live alone and need to take no one else’s opinions into consideration, which is why I have one of his pieces on my wall.

Here’s the logo to his website:

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A pic of the man himself in his studio:

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An album cover for Aesop Rock:

aesop-rock-jeremy-fish-1.jpg

A magazine cover for Juxtapoz:

lg287.jpg

A hotel room Jeremy Fish painted (I must stay there one day):

r71_web.jpg r72_web.jpg

Some pics from his Rome exhibition:

fish1-1.jpg fish2.jpg

And, apparently, he even designed a marital aid:

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He is also famous for designing skateboards, shoes, pillows, vinyl figures, etc. You can check out his work on his website, silly pink bunnies.

The other artist I wanted to share is Pete Fowler. I learned about him when I went to Kid Robot for the first time. I fell in love with his vinyl figures, and that was the beginning of my collection. He does these computer illustrations of woodland-dwelling oddities that look like they belong in a suburban basement with wood paneling and brick-colored shag carpeting, so much are they a throwback to the late ’60s slash early ’70s. I just find his work charming and delightful and sweet and eccentric.

Here is a flyer he designed, I assume for the series of vinyl characters “Pets and Their Owners” (which I really need to get):

petandowner.jpg

A wall mural he designed:

petes_wall_-_low_res.jpg

And album cover for the band Super Furry Animals:

super_furry_animals.jpg

Some other vinyl characters that I do own:

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And look! Someone has made an animated something-or-other with his work! Yay!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F1Q5umX4ioI

Once again, while his work is not for everyone, it is really fun and sweet. Pete Fowler’s website is Monsterism.

In fact, here is a picture of my living room with both artists’ work in it.

pete-fowler-jeremy-fish.jpg