Target hexagons, then Avatar review.

I went and saw Avatar: Dances with Smurfs* the other night. In Imax. In 3D. And no, I did not puke, thank you very much. But before I did that, I went to Target to pick up dishwashing liquid and lookit: hexagons! My favorite polygon is Target’s primary Christmas decoration!**

photo-target1 photo-target2

So, Avatar. There’s nothing I can really say that no one has said before. It’s very visually stunning and the plot is lame and if you do go see it, see it in 3D, because they do 3D correctly. They don’t have things popping out and punching you in the face, they have subtle elements creating depth, which is fine and lovely and why I didn’t get eye strain or a headache. Okay, some notes:

– You know the Disney movie Pocahontas? It’s the same plot. There’s a scene where hot blue native chick is taking ignorant white guy/avatar through the forest and she’s teaching him to appreciate nature and the music swells and for a brief second I thought I would hear Vanessa Williams start, “Can you PAINT with all the COLORS of the WIIIIIIIIIIND?!??”

– The subtitles are in orange-colored Papyrus font, which I tend to shun, but somehow that’s totally okay for this movie. I guess because both the font and the film are earnest and elegant and sorta cheesy. It works.

– Must every freakin’ creature be so vibrantly colored that I almost develop epilepsy? Has anyone ever been to a tropical jungle? Most all the animals are in the brown color range. Maybe some crazy-colored birds, or some poisonous frogs, but that’s kinda it. I realize it was a design choice to make everything pertaining to the humans gray and monochrome and everything Na’vi-related vibrant and alive, but it got to the point where I was looking forward to scenes with the big bad humans just so my eyes could get a break.

– Spoiler spoiler spoiler. When the bad evil white people set Home Tree on fire and it crashes to the ground, it is approximately the same size as the Titanic, and it falls at roughly the same speed. And I cannot put into words how desperately I wanted a blue person in a tuxedo to fall and then bounce off a gigantic propeller. Shocker: didn’t happen.

My final comment is that if you want to see this film, you need to see it in the theaters, preferably in 3D, because it just ain’t gonna cut it at home on your 50″ screen.

*I love that title, but I cannot take credit for it. I saw it somewhere on the internet. I’m using it anyway.

**Yes, I have a favorite polygon. I’m half-proud and half-ashamed of that.

Addendum on January 5th: You know my comment about Papyrus above? Apparently it’s rankling the graphic designer world big time. See link:

Additional Addendum: Yup, Disney’s Pocahontas. “Have you EVER seen the WOLF CRY to the BLUE CORN MOOOOOON?”

One Response to “Target hexagons, then Avatar review.”

  1. snorth says:

    I was trying to find your original post on the creepy rat thing that was in the drug store window. So I typed “rat” into the search box. And got NINE PAGES of results!!! NINE!!! That’s a lot of rattery.

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