A flurry of things.

1. This is fantastic. I’ve been a big PES fan since the two chairs having sex video on MTV. He made a deep-sea fish video with all metal things. Super-great.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AK18bdUEWSs

 

2. A book came out and I bought it. It is called “Heavenly Bodies: Cult Treasures and Spectacular Saints From The Catacombs.” After reading the whole thing, I have come to the conclusion that it should be called “Germans Do Weird Stuff With Their Dead: Too Much Free Time Apparently.” If a saint or martyr is particularly revered, after that person has become a skeleton the church decorates the hell out of them and puts them on display, most often in a jaunty, “Welcome to my sarcophagus, this is where the magic happens” kind of pose.

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The problem with dead people is that they tend to look… dead. Really thin and hollow and, you know, not alive. The solutions the church has found to lighten up these saints/martyrs are not helping. One approach is stuff gold all up in their faceholes. Seeing the chains in the sinuses make my nose feel full.

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Another is to make a paper-mache or wax mask. That is not an improvement. Just leave the skull alone, they don’t need to look like that for eternity, that’s not nice.

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I think it’s so funny that the people who make the outfits for these saints/martyrs always feels a need to cut out the area with the sternum and ribs, like we won’t think they’re really dead if we can’t see their exposed chest bones. I want to see an empty ribcage! They could just be really thin and lethargic! You’re not pulling the wool over my eyes, costume-maker!

Anyway, it’s a cool book and a lovely addition to any home.

heavenly-9

 

3. Does everyone know what “Lorem Ipsum” is? Here’s a definition from lipsum.com:

Lorem Ipsum is simply dummy text of the printing and typesetting industry. Lorem Ipsum has been the industry’s standard dummy text ever since the 1500s … It is a long established fact that a reader will be distracted by the readable content of a page when looking at its layout. The point of using Lorem Ipsum is that it has a more-or-less normal distribution of letters, as opposed to using ‘Content here, content here’, making it look like readable English.

It’s filler text until the real text shows up. So imagine my mirth when I got a burrito from Chipotle (yes, I know guacamole is extra, put it on anyway) to see this on one side of my bag:

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And this on the other side:

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Oh crap! Someone forgot to put real text on. After looking at a variety of articles about it, Chipotle said it was intentional, as little “Easter Egg” for designers to find. This reeks of PR cover-up spin, I believe it not. YOU DINE AT A TABLE OF LIES, CHIPOTLE.

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