I had maybe all the work to do. I still have most of the work to do. But I feel like it’s time to start to start sharing my trip which was, what, like over a month ago? Yeah, I need to get on that. I didn’t take a lot of pictures because I was trying to live in the moment like the magazines say but luckily many other people took pictures so I will pull their photos from the internet.
The first thing I did when I landed was hook up with my friend Ness who moved out to San Francisco to become a police officer. She’s been a cop for several years now and I’m still salty about it. I will never be unsalty about her leaving me. (I know she went there to pursue a better life but being completely self-absorbed I still think she left me. Personally. Just me.) Ness took me and Cricket all around the town. She drove us through the Tenderloin (“That’s the corner where you buy heroin… and that’s the corner where you buy crack and weed…”) I was like, heyyyy, Police Officer Lady, shouldn’t you do something about that maybe? Ness said, “First of all I’m off the clock. Secondly the drug trade is so inherent in the city that arresting them would accomplish nothing.” And honestly the drug trade was not an issue for me. The homeless people freakin’ everywhere was very much an issue for me. Seriously, I wouldn’t be surprised if the Kowloon Walled City popped up in midtown. If you don’t know about the Kowloon Walled City, it is cool as hell. Here is a description:
https://www.businessinsider.com/kowloon-walled-city-photos-2015-2
So the homeless people have tents everywhere which doesn’t bother me too much. And many of them sadly have some kind of mental problem, which is unfortunate but doesn’t bother me too much. What DOES bother me too much, and I’m sorry to get all graphic here, is the human feces all over the sidewalk. You heard me. In New York where people are civilized the homeless either poop in a corner edge of a building or poop on a piece of cardboard and throw it away (I’ve seen them do this, it’s the neighborly thing to do). That way it’s not in the middle of the sidewalk. In San Fran I walked with my head down the whole time because if I stepped in some I planned to cut off my foot at the ankle and burn it in a trash can. I need my foots so I was determined to not let that happen. When I was being a tourist in Chinatown (San Francisco has the oldest and largest Chinatown in America but New York’s is the most densely populated) and I skidded on a shiny leaf my first reaction was “FECES!!!” That’s not a great way to go through life. The other thing about San Francisco that I did not care for was the imminent perpetual threat of theft. Ness says they’ve stopped arresting people for snatch-and-grabs or car break-ins. According to one news piece I watched there are 31,000 car break-ins A YEAR. That’s straight-up bananas.
Not everything in San Francisco is trash, please don’t get that impression. There were many things I really enjoyed. I loved the old houses. LOVED.
Another gorgeous structure; The Now Scientology Headquarters of SF, Formerly The Original TransAmerica Building.
Other things I loved about San Francisco: I had dim sum, it was magnificent; The California Academy of Science was the best natural history / aquarium / botanical garden combo pack in the world (more on that later); Muir Woods is breathtaking and glorious (more on that later as well), the weather is scrumptious… there’s a lot to love.
I think Ness should return to NY tho.
